Sunday, February 28, 2010

Deactivated

As part of Lent, I left facebook. I thought my withdrawl would suck me back in, but I got to be honest, I have been enjoying not being tied down to the computer, and games. Although I miss the heck out of my FarmVille. I decided to import my blog into facebook before I left. Although I had the link to reach me here on my info page, many weren't sure how to get there. I had thought about resetting my privacy and not allowing notifications be sent to my email, but decided against it.

Fast forward to February 24th and this post. I had been off facebook for one week. At first I received some of the greatest responses. In fact, I wrote about one here. I was feeling good.

A friend from high school, someone I had reconnected with on facebook, left me a comment, innocent enough, and had said, "THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!!" She was someone who had posted a comment a few days before, and obviously had her own story that I REALLY wanted to log into facebook about and ask, but decided against it. I was grateful for her comment, as I always am, and thought nothing more of it. Until...

My Auntie left me a comment. She simply stated HER opinion and said, "some things don't pass." I understood where my Aunt was coming from and why she would feel that way. After all, she is the mother of my cousin who was murdered, and the grandmother to Mandelyn (the little angel who I called my niece). For my Aunt, the senseless murder of her only son will NEVER pass. How could it? For Sara, the death of her only daughter (Mandelyn) will NEVER pass. I get it. I understood my Auntie's response. I broke Lent, signed into facebook, and tried to explain what my Aunt had been through. By then, it was too late. WAR broke out over the next few days on my facebook.

I was SICKENED by the emails coming into my inbox. LITERALLY, sickened. I left it alone, believing, as I do still now, these 2 GROWN women can handle it themselves. I guess I should have logged in and deleted each individual post as it came in, or just deleted the entire thread. I considered it, but I was NOT going to be sucked into moderating my facebook. I thought it would come to "let's agree to disagree". It didn't. I even posted about walking a mile in someone else's shoes, and that was taken completely out of context. I was STUNNED and SADDENED by the turn of events. And then...a threat was made.

My friend told my Aunt that she would be out here in 3 weeks and she could join her son. Well now, that is COMPLETELY different. Let's not go THERE! I was shocked because my friend, up until this point, claimed to be Christian, and I enjoyed her view on life, had been keeping her in prayer (as I finally did get that story I was looking for from her), and wasn't aware of ANY Christian I knew who would make a death threat. As I said, I wasn't going to get in the middle, but someone else didn't feel the same way, and she, though feeling the need to protect my Aunt, took this to a whole new level of low and it spiraled out of control from there.

I logged in late last night, in tears, watching the EVIL spew from mouths. One person even went as far as saying, "There is no f***ing God..." and that was it for me. If you are living like there is no God, you had BETTER be right. Hell is a terrible place. And if you truly believe there is no God, where is my cousin? Where is Mandelyn? No, no, I won't stand for such nonsense vomited onto MY facebook. Did I mention this was ALL being said on MY facebook. Good grief. I would like to know how MY blog about MY son's diabetes and what MY family is going through could turn into this?

When I awoke this morning, my head was clearer. It helped to pray on it last night, and our series at church right now is touching upon the war we are in. A great friend emailed me this morning, supporting everything I had in my head, and it helped tremendously. I left facebook to deepen my commitment to God. Satan wasn't handling it very well, as I had done a great job (even I didn't know I could hang on for as long as I had). My friend reminded me we are at spiritual war, and to put my armor on. I truly believe I've been wearing it, otherwise the "old" Tiffany, Tiffany B.C. (BEFORE CHRIST) would have come to the table to play. I think of that "old" Tiffany, and PRAISE GOD she doesn't rear her ugly head. Instead, she deactivated her facebook until Lent is over, because I refuse to have to log in to moderate the sick, vile things being regurgitated onto MY facebook, or cringe every time I go to check my email.

Are you wearing your armor?

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints. Ephesians 6:10-18

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